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You woke up because Mr. Kirkland never snored, but this morning, he was. His chest rose and fell with effort underneath you, and he tossed his head in his sleep. It wasn’t long before he woke himself up, coughing a couple times. You slid off to let him sit up and he did, body wracked by a fit of coughs. “Augh…shit…”
“You okay, babe?”
He breathed through his mouth, staring at you a bit dazedly for a moment. “Yes, I think I’b—I’m fine.” He cleared his throat, sniffing.
“No you’re not, babe. You’re sick.” You stroked his face, gave his cheek a tender kiss, and casually felt his forehead. “You don’t have any noticeable fever. Likely just a cold, I don’t think you have to worry.”
He groaned, slumping against the headboard. His cheeks were a little bit flushed. “I’m not sick,” he said. “I’m definitely not sick. What time is it? I’m hungry. Would you like breakfast?”
“Uh…” While your darling teacher was a well-meaning, loving guy, he wasn’t exactly the best at cooking. He tried. He really did, but… “I’m not very hungry this morning. I think I’ll just have cereal.”
“Right.” He threw back the covers and you stared, letting out a naughty chuckle at the way he shyly tried to conceal his nakedness.
“Oh come on, it isn’t like I’ve never seen you naked,” you said. “It isn’t like we haven’t fucked more times than I can count on my fingers.”
Regardless, his face was still red and blushing as he pulled the top sheet off the bed and wrapped it around him. It dragged far behind him as he left the room. “We haven’t had that much…s-sex…”
“Clearly not, if you’re still stuttering it!” you called, quickly answered by a loud sneeze. And then another.
“A-ahh—nnchu!” This time, after a brief pause, you heard a thud. “Whoa, ah…”
You got up out of bed and found him in the hallway, leaning heavily on the wall for support with his eyes screwed shut. “What happened?”
“Just got…really dizzy, hang on,” he said. He took a sickly sniffle and winced, standing upright. Blinking and rubbing his eyes, he opened his mouth to speak, but instead what came out was “hunnnn—tchou! Hak-chou!” He held a hand over his mouth, bridge of his nose wrinkling up as he moaned miserably.
“Arthur, you’re sick,” you said softly, combing your fingers through his messy blond hair. “Go back to bed. I’ll make you some tea.”
“But…but I’m no-t—ah--!” He suppressed the sneeze this time, sighing, but then his body tensed up again and both hands flew to his nose, leaving the sheet to drop to the ground as he “CHOUUU!” Nose and cheeks completely flushed, he gave you weak eyes and begrudgingly headed for the bedroom, dragging the sheet behind him like a giant, sick toddler.
--
“Here you are, sweetheart.” You set his tea on a coaster on his end table, and placed a warm plate of breakfast in his lap. In your absence he had dressed in his pajamas and fetched a fleece blanket, now all bundled up and grumpy.
“Thank you,” he sighed, taking a sip of the tea. “I can’t believe I’m sick…”
“Lots of people get sick, Mr. Kirkland.”
“Shut up,” he chided. “I mean I’ve…been so careful. I can’t be sick. I’ll have to get a substitute for next week and we’re already behind in the lesson plan and I—“
“Shhhh. It’ll be fine, you’re not that sick,” you said.
“No, of course I am! I’m running a fever now, I’m sure of it, and I…I feel weak, and I have a headache, and my throat hurts terribly, and I’ve started feeling nauseous…”
“Weren’t you just trying to convince me you were fine earlier?” You put a hand to his forehead again. “Well, you are a bit hot…let me get a thermometer…”
“And some pain pills, please?”
You rolled your eyes but followed the request anyway, prompting him to open his mouth. “Yes, you do have a fever…not a bad one, though.”
He took a couple aspirin and a deep breath, setting his food aside. “Not very hungry anymore, sorry…”
“Well, you’re quite the complainer when you’re sick,” you said, snuggling up to his side. “That’s good to know. I might have to break up with you.”
“What?!”
“I’m kidding.” You kissed his fevered forehead, stroking his hair lovingly. “You’ll be better very soon, trust me.”
“No, no, I’m going to need…get me the telephone, I need to arrange for a sub—“
“No you don’t,” you assured, pressing down on his shoulder as he tried to get up. “You need to stay in bed and rest. If you’re still sick tomorrow night, we’ll worry about it then, but it’s Saturday and you need to rest.”
“But I can’t rest, I…test! I have tests to grade--!”
“Arthur!”
You watched his anxious, flushed face as he slowly relaxed himself, looking down at his hands. “I suppose you’re right…”
“You’re damn right I’m right.”
He smiled weakly, and then suddenly his face screwed up into the tell-tale expression of a sneeze. “Hhht—chhhk, hnnnn—chuuh! Bluh…”
You grabbed a nearby box of tissues and placed them within his reach, for which he thanked you. As soon as he took a break from moaning and groaning and fidgeting, you stroked one of his thighs through the blanket, looking up into his reddened face. “Do you think…you’d feel better if I gave you head?”
“What?” He froze up instantly, cheeks growing darker. “I’m-I’m-I’m sick! That w-wouldn’t exactly be in your best interest!”
“Ugh, Arthur. Come on,” you groaned. “Once you have the symptoms of a cold, it isn’t contagious anymore. And we had sex like three times last night. If I was in any danger of getting sick, I’m screwed already. Literally.”
“W-well, I…”
“Orgasms are great headache relievers.”
He stared at you, wide-eyed and blushing hotter than his fever. He opened his mouth, then closed it again, and repeated this action. Finally, he pulled the fleece blanket tighter around his shoulders and looked away. “F-fine…I mean, yes please.”
Yeah, Iggy has the dreaded man flu. I just thought it kinda fit his personality...
There's really no reason for him to be a teacher in this, except for the fact that it fits with these [link] [link] and I mean, well
I'm pretty sure we've established how insane I am for having a thing for teachers in the first place.

Hey. Hey, babe. You know who you are ;) Was this pleasing? I hope it was. It was mostly for you, anyway <3

Also, I am so sorry about the Labyrinth fic. Time is just going by quicker than I notice and it's not exactly like these chapters are easy...I'm trying to challenge myself so that this thing has actual puzzles instead of just a bunch of UST and tsundere flirting. But the next chapter is definitely coming up within the next few days.
Add a Comment:
 
:iconsilverneko1:
SilverNeko1 Featured By Owner Apr 4, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
"dreaded man flu"

XD
Reply
:iconmeowhug17:
Meowhug17 Featured By Owner Mar 11, 2015  Student Filmographer
Hahahaahhah have fun Artie~
Reply
:icondarkangel5206:
darkangel5206 Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
"Ooh,it's getting to the good part"
Perv plz 
"Why did it have to end?!"
Lovely Shoujo (Aaaaah Nooo) [V3] School Rumble: NOOO (Harima Version) 
Reply
:iconfusion1121:
fusion1121 Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2015
This narrator is a whore, sorry.
Reply
:icongothfoxgirl:
Gothfoxgirl Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2015
-can't stop laughing-
Reply
:iconnotsogirlygirl22:
notsogirlygirl22 Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2014
it is so cute then i like what the ...
Reply
:iconyellowvixen:
YellowVixen Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
me: *reading* wait, what, it didn't say lemon or lime in the title...
thoughts: :iconiggybrowsplz:
me:......awww, it ended. i-i mean, what?! of course it ended! o////////O
Reply
:iconsirwilliamreynolds:
SirWilliamReynolds Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2014
We need more of these...
Reply
:iconcuzimdanish123:
CuzImDanish123 Featured By Owner Mar 12, 2014
:iggybrowsplzgif:
Reply
:iconhetaliaireland15:
hetaliaireland15 Featured By Owner Feb 13, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
ooooomg what did you do! reader ewwwww XD
Reply
:iconprofile192115:
Profile192115 Featured By Owner Oct 12, 2013
Ohmygod Ohmygod! I feel so dumb now! I read the other one where he was sick, and I was looking at the part where he was sneezing and I was wondering if you were speaking some kind of complicated language or something! But now it seems so obvious! Ahh! (Loved this by the way it's hilarious, so is the America one)
Reply
:iconlevlion526:
Levlion526 Featured By Owner Oct 6, 2013
Oh my goodness i-i-i have read all of the squeals an :iconifaintplz:
Reply
:iconstarandtwinkleninjas:
Starandtwinkleninjas Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Here, Scotland, take these :icontissuesplz: :3
Reply
:icon0-pandahero-0:
0-PandaHero-0 Featured By Owner Aug 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:iconimwiththeunicorn::iconletmehugyouplz:
Reply
:iconhinatathebloom1:
Hinatathebloom1 Featured By Owner Jul 2, 2013
Loved it ^w^
Reply
:iconbloodlove25:
BloodLove25 Featured By Owner Jun 29, 2013
Arthur you dirty bastard you!
Reply
:iconimwiththeunicorn:
ImWiththeUnicorn Featured By Owner Aug 11, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
;)
Reply
:iconedwardelric2013:
EdwardElric2013 Featured By Owner May 11, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
gaah!
-nosebleeds-
Reply
:iconimwiththeunicorn:
ImWiththeUnicorn Featured By Owner May 19, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:icontissuesplz:
Reply
:iconedwardelric2013:
EdwardElric2013 Featured By Owner May 20, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
thanks
Reply
:iconlokiswife13:
lokiswife13 Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013
is there a squel to this because this is jusy sexy as hell
:iconepicclapplz:
Reply
:iconimwiththeunicorn:
ImWiththeUnicorn Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Reply
:iconlokiswife13:
lokiswife13 Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2013
those to were awesome
Reply
:iconimwiththeunicorn:
ImWiththeUnicorn Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Glad you enjoyed~
Reply
:iconlokiswife13:
lokiswife13 Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2013
:)
Reply
:iconthefemalebtt:
TheFemaleBTT Featured By Owner Mar 3, 2013
Oh gosh XD I fuckin love this series.
The first one I was laughing way to hard and rolling on my bed XD the next two were just amusing and plain sexy~
Reply
:iconimwiththeunicorn:
ImWiththeUnicorn Featured By Owner Mar 5, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Ahhh thank you ^^ Glad to see you've enjoyed.
Reply
:iconbluelady1927:
bluelady1927 Featured By Owner Feb 15, 2013
orgasms are great headache relievers?

*perverted smile*
Reply
:iconimwiththeunicorn:
ImWiththeUnicorn Featured By Owner Feb 18, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Yes, they are :iconiggybrowsplz:
Reply
:iconrjmb:
RJMB Featured By Owner Feb 13, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
y-your....a HETALIAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i didn't know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hehehehhehehehehehheeheheheehe! this is awesome! so are all your other stories! awesomenessessess
Reply
:iconimwiththeunicorn:
ImWiththeUnicorn Featured By Owner Feb 14, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Yes I am 8D nice surprise, eh?
Thank you so much! Glad you like them :3
Reply
:iconrjmb:
RJMB Featured By Owner Feb 16, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
no, thank YOU for writing them!
Reply
:iconimwiththeunicorn:
ImWiththeUnicorn Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:iconohstopityouplz:
Reply
:icontorivampire:
torivampire Featured By Owner Feb 11, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
More more I wanna know what happens next -very energetic-
Reply
:iconimwiththeunicorn:
ImWiththeUnicorn Featured By Owner Feb 11, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Oh, well... [link]
Reply
:icontenshinoakasuna:
TenshiNoAkasuna Featured By Owner Feb 9, 2013
Actually, a little more fluff than sexual things is often better, I think. But sexual stuff also isn't that bad. ;P
THANK YOU, AGAIN, BUT THIS TIME FOR THIS HEARTWARMING CHAPTER! (=
Reply
:iconimwiththeunicorn:
ImWiththeUnicorn Featured By Owner Feb 9, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
It's all fine. No, it's all fantastic. Fluff and sex are both great.
You're so very welcome, I'm so happy you like these so much!
Reply
:icontenshinoakasuna:
TenshiNoAkasuna Featured By Owner Feb 9, 2013
Haha, I guess? ;D
Of course, who wouldn't like it... o-o
Reply
:iconimwiththeunicorn:
ImWiththeUnicorn Featured By Owner Feb 9, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Hehehe <3 you're too kind.
Reply
:iconkushamisaru:
kushamisaru Featured By Owner Feb 8, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Oh no, Iggy's sick D:
He'd be screwed if that were me -not in the good way either- because... I'm evil to sick people XD I hate being sick.

But uh... If it's true that once the symptoms show it's no longer contagious... I guess I can try to be nicer. Try. :nod:

And how great are orgasms? Is there anything they can't cure? XD
Reply
:iconimwiththeunicorn:
ImWiththeUnicorn Featured By Owner Feb 8, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
LOLOL
I tend to treat them like they're dying like "do you need water are you sure how many ice cubes do you need a bendy straw i will drive down to the store right now to buy you one and while i'm there do you want disneyland tickets for your whole family what channel do you want shall i skip through commercials for you LET ME FLUFF YOUR PILLOW"

Well, it's what I've heard :) which is nice. Sometimes at church I'll be all "hug!" and someone'll be all "Oh but I'm sick I don't want you to catch it" so I give 'em that little fun fact and we're all good. :D

Uhmmm STDs probably *shot*
Reply
:iconkushamisaru:
kushamisaru Featured By Owner Feb 8, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Awww bless your heart! You're a much nicer person than me XD

I must research this! :icondetirminationplz:

That's the first thing that came to mind for me too XD
Reply
:iconimwiththeunicorn:
ImWiththeUnicorn Featured By Owner Feb 8, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
XD well to be fair I do it to solicit praise, so in the end it's still selfish.

LOLOLL great we're both pervs.
Reply
:iconkushamisaru:
kushamisaru Featured By Owner Feb 8, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
It's okay, I do stuff like that too.

Well, we're talking about orgasms; it's hard not to be XD
Reply
:iconimwiththeunicorn:
ImWiththeUnicorn Featured By Owner Feb 8, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
LOLOL truth.
Reply
:iconkatuthekat:
KatuTheKat Featured By Owner Feb 8, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
oh well uH

UMMM
HNNNNGH

FDKLGSJHKKKSFHKGFLHGKJSHGKH
thank you <33333 this is so perfect
Reply
:iconimwiththeunicorn:
ImWiththeUnicorn Featured By Owner Feb 8, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You're welcome, dear ;) consider it an early Valentine's day gift. <3
Wow never mind never Valentine's day ever ugh I don't even know how tO
Reply
:iconkatuthekat:
KatuTheKat Featured By Owner Feb 8, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
jfdlhkg it's so amazing gonna die omfg

what why never valentines day
Reply
:iconimwiththeunicorn:
ImWiththeUnicorn Featured By Owner Feb 8, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
No don't die if you die we can't have sex anymore

And because I've never actually
had anyone special during Valentine's day before so I always kinda ignored it and I don't
know how to Valentine's day
Reply
:iconkatuthekat:
KatuTheKat Featured By Owner Feb 8, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
but it's so beautiful why do you do these things for me

awww
hun
but don't you have someone now??
Reply
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